She Really Is Choosing Her Own...

So, I guess it's time for some words...

Maybe it's been a long time coming.  Maybe it's a rash decision.  Maybe it doesn't matter how we got here, only that, we are here.

I must say, it seems to me that if ever there were an "amicable" divorce, this is such.  So far.  Patrick and I are actually getting along better than we have in a long time.  Perhaps it is because, there is nothing left for which to argue.  

While I don't pretend that the road ahead will not be uncertain and awkward, I do have great hope for our family:  all four of us.

Thank you.  Truly.  I have been so truly supported these last weeks.  Your kindness, yes YOUR kindness, has been divinely appreciated.  Thank you for helping me navigate these new waters, carefully, and boldly.  Thank you for the gentle strength you have shared with me.

(See?  Not too bad for a couple shaking out troubled times...)

Before I share a letter with you (which some of you have already seen), I need to thank a certain friend who helped craft the letter (thank you friend).  :)

I have not moved out yet.  I have, however, ordered furniture!  Patrick has been extremely helpful with all, and has even offered to help hang my pictures and curtains (which I hate to do).  I get the keys to this new journey on Friday... 

Dear Friends,

We are writing this email to share some very difficult news with you. After 9+ years together, Patrick and I have decided to separate and will be filing for divorce in the weeks ahead.  This has not been an easy decision for us to make, however, we mutually feel it is the correct one.  God has blessed us with two wonderful children and our primary concern now lies only with how we can make this transition as easy as possible for them.  

While our relationship details remain a private matter, it is important for us that you know of our feelings as we go through this challenging period in our lives.  As a result of our separation, Patrick and I will soon be living in two different residences, adjusting to separate living environments and sharing custody of our children.  This will not be easy on any of us, but we will deal with the situation as best we can.  Our goal is to handle this as we have tried to handle all of our shared experiences – with respect, compassion, honesty and best intentions for one-another.  While we continue to work through parent time-sharing options for Tatum and Chase, we are determined to come up with a plan which will be the most beneficial for them.  Patrick and I do not have anger towards each other and we still want to be a part of each other’s lives in both the short and long term future. As such, we are still planning on attending family/holiday events together, we are still planning on sharing time with Tatum and Chase together, and we will still be interacting with our shared friends at normal functions. 

This is understandably going to be awkward for our friends, but please know that Patrick and I still consider ourselves very close friends and it is not a problem for us to bump into each other in social settings. We would appreciate your efforts in maintaining as much routine and normalcy as possible with regard to invitations, communications, parties, etc..

We have recently discussed this with Tatum and Chase and will continue to lift them in these times.  Thank you for your understanding and caring during this challenging time.  

Sincerely,
Patrick and Jamie